A Visit From One Of The 3 Nephites - 2012 Opening Nite Stake Men's Basketball

6:00 PM Game    Cortina 1st vs Cortina 2nd

When Cortina 2nd Ward was a NO SHOW I was thinking "somethings never change" – namely teams not showing up on game night…… And this is MY home ward, too! Led by Kyle McCluskey, who has successfully navigated Cortina to be a perennial 3rd place finisher and everything. Most teams would give the boot to a manager that can't do better than 3rd place year after year, but Cortina 2nd doesn't have anyone else willing to take the lead or any more capable, so Kyle remains…… I later learned Cortina had a "Daddy Daughter" Primary Activity and that's why they were a No Show, except for one fellow that did show up who evidently does not have a daughter in primary. That his wife & young kids came to watch would verify that assumption.

A Cortina 1st Warder warming up for the game that was not to be, put up a shot that was obviously not gonna hit the rim & hollered, "Oh NO, it short." His ever sympathetic teammate quipped, "probably won't be the only short shot you have tonight!" Such fellowship!

Those that did show up decided to revert to the traditional method of selecting teams & shoot free throws. The 1st five that make a free throw are on a team. After a half dozen brick shots I told them to just count out 1 - 2, 1 - 2, etc. to select teams as they would only had 40 minutes of game time & by the time five of them made a free-throw the time allotted to play would all be used up. (And the same guys that can't make a free throw like to attempt three point shots!!)

"RAWR!" Image by Riley Kaminer via Flickr

6:40 PM Game    Ironwood vs Nauvoo Station

A quick reminder, my son Tyler has finished his US Army service which included two tours in Afghanistan. First as a Paratrooper with 82nd Airborne, then as a Sergeant with Psy Ops / Special Operations.

Tyler has whined his whole ball playing career that I am unfair and do not call foul on players when theyfoul him. Feel free to hammer him when you play Nauvoo Station. I'm still not gonna give him any breaks!!

I've got to admit my son Tyler did make me proud in his debut playing for Nauvoo Station in the Queen Creek North State Men's Basketball Program and almost lived up to the hype he was putting up about his "game". In fact, Nauvoo Station finally won a game, prevailing 46 to 33 this time. The Nauvoo station brethren need to take up a collection & buy some "up to date" shorts for one of the Garlock boys who showed up wearing shorts that were throwbacks to the late 70's - way too short & way too tight. Avoiding the embarrassment of being seen by the Sistern of the ward was the only good thing about none of those single Sistern in showing up to watch the game. Fortunately Brother Wright, the ever faithful bishopric member, did show up and handled the scorekeeping duty.

If you've never seen Northern Arizona Native American "Reservation Basketball" you've not seen an awesome display of fitness & endurance and a unique brand of basketball. This season I worked a Post Season Tournament Game in Prescott Village at the Tim's Toyota Center. Many of the teams were from the reservation. Just prior to the Tip Off of my game a Native American fan hollered, "get ready to run like you've never run before ref!!" And he was right, too!! Well, Nauvoo Station had a Native American player show up. No one seemed to know if he was in their ward or had been invited by a ward member to come play. (He might even be one of the 3 Nephites for all I could find out). From the moment he stepped on the floor until he stepped off the court he did not stop running. He ran whoever was guarding him from Ironwood ward ragged. It was great to see that style of play, so I hope he plays the rest of the season!! If he does, and you're guarding him – get ready to run!!

A pleasant surprise for this game was Chris Capps of the Cortina 2nd Ward, a season High School Varsity and Tournament experienced Referee, he showed up to say saying he'd come to help referee. Also Jon Mott, Ironwood Crossing's Elder Quorum President, former Globe High School Boys Varsity Coach and currently coaching at Coolidge High School also showed up saying he'd come to referee. He figured learning more about how referees work and think would help him be a better High School Coach. That may be so, but the thing that would best help Jon to be a better coach would be to have a few players on his team taller than 5' 8"…… Tough to rebound & win against a 6' 5" Center when your Center is 5' 8".

7:20 PM Game    Cortina 3rd vs Vineyard 

I don't remember much about this game. One of the players was a fellow I had taught as a Teachers Quorum Advisor when I first moved to Queen Creek five years ago. Nothing like seeing a "kid " you taught and finding out he's now 19 to make a fellow feel old!! I was in such a state of shock I don't know if we even had two full teams.

8 PM Game       Desert Mountain vs Ranch 

8:40 PM Game    Cambria vs Rittenhouse 

Don't remember anything about these games I was working with Jon Mott on the court and did not take any notes. Jon has learned that when a ball goes Out of Bounds & he is the referee nearest the ball, it is advisable for him to blow his whistle. Jon's most common question of the night was, "Guess I should have blown my whistle on that play, shouldn't I?" He is learning it's a lot easier to referee from the coaches sideline then when wearing the striped shirt.

I'm hopeful Jon and Chris can help referee most of our games because when they can't you brethren will get to experience the referee challenge! The alternative is to let you call your own fouls and I already know that doesn't work!! There are some players that insist "I never touched him", even when there's blood evidence, who'll who will never call a foul on themselves. And there are some that will be slammed into the stage and say it was a clean play and not call a foul on the other guy.

9:20 PM Game   Crismon vs Remington Heights 

A rematch from one of last season's Semi-Final Games and it WAS A GAME!! We could have charged admission for the quality of this one!! Crismon squeaked it out again by one point in the closing seconds of the game. Marc (what was his last name?) from Remington Ward showed why he's the dominant player in our stake and it almost looked like he'd pull off the win on his own late in the game. But Crismon also had several excellent players and held on. (Sometimes literally.)

Because you asked and I'm such a nice guy: We are playing High School Rules which do not allow players on a Free-Throw to enter the lane until the shot hits the rim (that's assuming the shot will hit the rim, of course.) Everyone wants to think they're NBA and want to enter on the "release" by the shooter. "Ask and you shall receive "– as an experiment I'm going to say OK to that even though I'm concerned it's going to lead to a lot more pushing and shoving for position and elbows to the chin. We'll try it for a few nights to be sure you are all behaving yourselves. Don't mess it up!

Lost but found: A V-necked Diamondbacks long sleeved warm up shirt. Tell me what color it is & it's yours. If no one claims it after a couple weeks it's headed to DI. You can check with me after this Sunday Evening's Stake Conference Adult Session.

Schedule change coming: Got a notice the gym will be closed one week in May for floor refinishing so I need to make an adjustment to the schedule, so be watching for that.

Ladies Nites: A few Sistern have asked when they get to play basketball. Some are former High School Players, you see, who miss playing the sport. Even though I sometimes think I'm watching some Brethren play like women on our men's nites, (one player complained he had been poked by a "too long fingernail" Tuesday night) perhaps it's fair to give the ladies at least one night to organize and play? So, since these reports are passed by Present Bagley and High Counselor Arnson to President McClure, this will serve as my asking the Stake Presidency if they'll approve one night of Ladies Basketball this season. If I get permission I'll let you know. Until then it's no use asking me about it anymore because I ain't the Stake Relief Society President and I don't schedule women's sports.

QCNS Basketball Report 4.4.11

An unscientific Survey was conducted at a recent Sisteren's Stake Volley Ball Open Play nite about the interest level in playing Women's Basketball or Softball. Apparently there is only limited interest in Basketball but more than a moderate interest level in playing softball. So I'll explore working the ladies into some Stake Softball this next season, which runs August 16- Nov 15. I would appreciate some feed back if the ladies prefer ladies only games or Co-Ed.

Saw a fellow I did not recognize on stage watching the games. I asked which team he was rooting for. "None of them. I'm waiting for a meeting to start and I'm not sure which is the more painful. A boring meeting or watching this game."

As has become the norm, several Ward's had trouble fielding full teams. Only one Ward had a good excuse- I think it was Desert Mountain- who said several of their players were farmers and were out in their fields "a hayin". Now, I've heard the term, "Make hay while the sun shines'' but I never knew they still made hay in the dark!! But I guess they do.

6:00 Cortina 1st VS Ironwood- Apparently both teams were still basking in the afterglow of Romney's Tri-State Presidential Primary election on Tuesday as BOTH teams were NO SHOWS. Good thing these games don't count for anything in the Post Season Tournament qualifying. Otherwise how would I pick a game winner when not a single person showed up!! A Spectator who was an avid Church & City League Softball & Basketball player back in the 80's & 90's, asked me, "What's wrong with these guys today being "NO SHOWS". We never did that!! I wish you folks would stick to asking me questions I know the answers to! My best guess is that back in the "Old Days" there were no Gameboys, x-boxes or Twitter to distract the Brethren?

6:40 Crismon VS Cortina 3rd- Fortunately I never have to worry about having full teams for these wards!! It was even Mutual Nite for Crismon & they still managed to field a full team. The schedule does rotate game nites so no single Ward take the brunt of having to forego games each week due to YM/YW or Scout Activities. Crismon even had some spectators saying they'd come down to watch some good basketball. Wrong place for that......A spectator sitting on the stage asked me why we weren't calling "3 seconds in the lane". Well, there are several reasons:

1. They are calling their won fouls & violation. No one wants to be accused of being a pansy by calling a 3 Seconds Violation on the opponent.
2. I'm not sure if these guys can even count to 3 while intently focused on their game effort.
3. With the physical conditioning of some of the Brethren, it takes them 3 seconds just to cross the lane.
4. Why ruin the scrum under the basket on shots & rebounds- it creates great entertainment value- almost like watching The Hunger Games.

But just so folks know what to expect when we get to the Post Season Tournament and we bring in experienced Referees...... here's the rules interpretation & philosophy Referees adhere to:

• If a player is in the key 3 seconds & begins to move out of the key, let it go
• If a player dribble into the key & remains for 3 seconds & then starts a shot attempt to dribbles back out, let it go.
• If a player is in the key 3 seconds & the recovers a loose ball or received a pass and initiates a shot attempt, let it go.
• 3 Seconds is NOT in effect while rebounding is going on as there is no Team Possession of the ball.
• There is no 3 seconds violation against the Defense. ( You'd be surprised how many times people are yelling "Call 3 Seconds you idiot Referee" on Defense during High School Games. It may be idiocy to enjoy being a Referee, but who's the real idiot, begging for a 3 second violation call against Defense.)

I'm guessing young Strebeck has found some shoes made with Flubber. I'm quite sure he hasn't elevated as much as he did tonight since the last time he was in the bucket of a ladder truck snatching a cat from a tree limb!

7:40 Nauvoo Station VS Rittenhouse- This was Rittenhouse's Brent Fuhriman's final game with our Stake as he leaves Friday for the Mission Field.

Not only did we have 5 on 5, Rittenhouse even had a Substitute. It was clear from their pre-game conversations they did not know what to do with an extra player.

Pre-game the Nauvoo Station feller were whine, whine, whine 'cause I'd said in my last report they hadn't won a game all season. They claim to have won 2 games. So, OK, I'm now giving them credit for winning 2 games that don't count for anything and have set the record straight, such as it is.

It was a spirited if not high scoring game. With nearly 3 minutes elapsed time and NO SCORE, Bro Wright, who was performing the Score Keep duties, threatened to keep track of missed shots in lieu of made baskets. With finally Kyle, from Nauvoo Station dropped in an impressive 3 point shot (at least it would have been impressive if any of the Nauvoo Station Sisteren had managed to attend. Nauvoo Station did jump out to an impressive 7-1 lead. By half time they had forged that lead into a 21-15 deficit.

Nauvoo Station has an outstanding ball player & prime physical specimen athlete, Tyler Pear. In fact, he's so good and such a handsome fellow I'm surprised the Nauvoo Station Relief Society isn't charging admission to see this guy play in person. (It's rumored his mom & dad might be persuaded to pay some marriage eligible Sisteren to come watch him play to get him married off, but I can't confirm that.) Anyway, Tyler initiated one of his patented drives to the hoop & collided with a defender. BOTH players crumplef to the ground. NO FOUL WAS CALLED....... Both players looked at me to make a call. Hey, I'm sitting on the stand as a Spectator now. The consensus opinion of the Brethren of the Hardwood's said you'd rather call yer own fouls than wear the striped shirts & hang whistles around your necks. That's what'cha get when youse calls your own fouls......

Had a situation where the ball was lodge between the rim & the backboard ("lodged" is Referee lingo for the ball got stuck.) No one could jump high enough to knock it loose until Chris Jones adjusted the Nitro level in his new Nike Super Swisher Shoes up a few notches until he could finally jump high enough to knock it loose. Turns out those new shoes are a better investment than he persuaded his wife them to be when he got caught trying to sneak them into his house from the store!

This game even counts as a Missionary effort. Seems that fellow I thought was one of the 3 Nephites hasn't been baptized yet.

Oh, yeah, Nauvoo Station Ward finally eeked out a 43 -38 loss, so they've still won only 2 games all season.

8:00 Cortina 2nd VS Desert Mountain- Both teams were short handed & had to recruit fellas from the prior games. Many were willing. Since Tyler Pear does live in the Cortina 2nd Ward boundaries, they claimed him as a player. Gave him extra time to work on his sweet jumper & drives to the hoop.

Ron Daniels, Cortina 2nd Ward's Senior Citizen player asked if we had any "Special Rules" for guys over 60. Yes, Ron, We do. If you play in this league at 60+ you not only qualify for Medicare, you're gonna need it the next morning. That's your "Special Rule."

A highlight of this game was a high leaping steal by Kyle McCluskey of a down court pass, the drive to the basket & acrobatic Lay Up to score. (Well, some parts of that statement may be true. Other parts of it may have been fabricated. You make the call!).

Darryl Hasson of Cortina 2nd Ward came out of a self imposed "Semi Retirement" to play. I think most of the guys in our league are Semi Retired as basketball players but just don't realize it yet! Darryl still has dead aim on the rim with his jump shots. He just doesn't have quite enough jump left in his shots to get the ball over the rim.

James Hansen (Cortina 2nd) has been wearing a knee brace trying to recover from a badly torn up knee last season. Pre-game he announced, "Me knee feels pretty good, so I'm not gonna wear my knee brace tonight! After twisting it late in the game & barely able to hobble off the court I think he'll wear the brace next week again!

Corinta 2nd is still stinging from my suggestion that their claim to victory last week was under embellished and was a rout of the other team, so the brought their own Score Keeper, the intrepid 7th grade Cortina Tigers Girl's Basketball team player, Beetle Bailey McCluskey. I overheard her dad admonish her to keep track of all his "Stats" during the game- baskets made, rebounds, assists, etc.

I'm glad Cortina 2nd did bring her as there can be NO DISPUTE that Desert Mountain led 28-12 at half time. However, according to Beetle Bailey's score tally, the final score was 34 and Cortina 2nd 35 for a spectacular Defensive Shut Down in the 2nd half. This time Desert Mountain, who were, "keeping score in our heads" dispute the Beetle's score. In the absence of a written score for Desert Mountain (and knowing they all think they shoot like Kobe Bryant in their heads which therefore throws considerable doubt on the veracity of any score kept in their heads) I declare Cortina 2nd the victor in a 1 pint rout!

This game had 2 teenagers don striped shirts & loop whistles around their necks to Referee!! They even blew the whistles a couple times, which is better then the "call your own fouls" ratio in some games.

After the game Beetle's dad sauntered over & asked her, "What were my game Stats?" She gave him a puzzled look, checking the score sheet and said, "You didn't have any!"

8:40 Ironwood Crossing VS Vineyard- Ironwood Crossing was short handed, so those 2 teens Referees got to play in the game. One of them, Chris, is from a family that was just recently baptized, too! As we were at Center Court ready to administer the Jump Ball to start the game, Chris suddenly says, "wanna see me touch the rim!?" and takes off running at the basket, making a mighty leaping effort. It's Rush Limbaugh, I think, who coined the adage, "Words mean things".  Well, Chris has a somewhat different interpretation of the "rim" constitutes than the rest of us. He touched one of the orange braces about 6 inches BELOW the actual rim. He was mightily perplexed when everyone just burst out laughing but finally came to understand that touching the rim means the ring at the top. He decided to give it another attempt but met with the same result. One day I'm sure he will be able to touch the rim. Today wasn't his day.

9:40 Remington Heights VS Ranch- Remington Heights had a full contingent +2. Ranch had to forage thru the hallways to scrounge up extra players. Enough were found to get the game going. When I looked out and saw an 11 year old had put on a referee Shirt and was walking up the side of the court holding the whistle in his hand, poised to call a foul I figured anything else I could note about this game was just going down hill and decided to check the doors & lock the place up to get ready to head for home!

Queen Creek North Stake Men's B-Ball Report
April 4 2012